208/365 (July 28, 2010) – Took the motorcycle for a nice ride this morning/afternoon. Didn’t put a ton of mileage on it, about 60km, but there weren’t many people on the roads I took so it was lovely. Rode out to Deep Cove via Dollarton Highway, then up Seymour Parkway and up into Mount Seymour Park to the ski hill. Took a break up there and wandered around a bit, it’s always strange being up at a ski hill out of season. A few hikers, some cyclists, pretty quiet.
Saw this sign and pondered the philosophy behind responsibility.
Responsibility. It’s a simple word, but people don’t seem to get it. We need to take responsibility for our actions, but in today’s society we seem more likely to blame anyone else and avoid responsibility at all costs.
Accepting responsibility for your own actions that result, even moderately, in something unpleasant, is admitting a mistake, and unfortunately, no one likes to admit mistakes. So we justify our actions and convince ourselves that we are innocent, without any blame in the situation. The simple act of consciously putting one’s self into something that has the potential to become a situation should be enough to lead to admission of, at least, partial responsibility.
If you are foolish enough to put yourself in a position that obviously could lead to a negative impact on you, then take responsibility for the fact that you put yourself there. No one else did, and any consequences are yours to bear, not the government’s, not the business’s, not “the other guy”.
If you can’t afford your mortgage payments, maybe it’s because you took out too big a loan rather than live within your means. The banks aren’t evil, they just did what you asked them to, gave you lots of money that you might not be able to afford payments on if your current financial status changed. If you are unhealthy because you eat McDonald’s 7 days a week, it’s not McDonald’s fault that you chose to have an unhealthy balance in your diet. If you trip on a curb and hurt yourself, it’s not the municipality’s fault for not putting a sign warning you that there is a curb (you do have eyes in your head). If you spill a coffee on yourself it’s not the coffee shop’s fault that you burnt yourself, perhaps you need to take responsibility for losing your grip on the cup. If you lose control of your car when a child runs out into the street, it’s not the child’s fault, it’s largely yours for not being aware of your surroundings while controlling a dangerous machine. If you receive a poor mark in your class it’s not the instructors fault for “not understanding you” it’s yours for not taking the time to ensure that you are aware of the requirements for successfully completing the course. If you get lost when going out of bounds and someone dies, it’s not the parks responsibility for not holding your hand, it’s yours for ignoring the rules. If you are arrested for being in a protest that turns ugly, it is not the fault of the police for not recognizing you in a crowd of thousands as being “innocent”. It is your fault for placing yourself in a position that any intelligent person recognizes as having the potential to turn into a riot with the right spark.
Sometimes the sense of entitlement and lack of taking responsibility today drives me over the deep end. If you make a mistake, admit it, then move on. If you make a less-than-intelligent decision, accept the consequences. You gain more respect through admission than from any attempt to shift the blame. Shifting the blame makes you look like you are in grade two.
“It’s my fault” “I accept responsibility” “I am (at least) partially to blame” See, not so hard!
And guess what, usually the conflict will cease because accepting responsibility for your actions also tends to defuse conflict.
End of rant.
